In the light.

Hmmm okay i decided to blog this after somehow God pointed out to me that i should blog about this. Lol.

Erm i cant really remember if i have blogged this before or repeated many times, but oh well, its still for God's sake.

Its not a surprise many people have mistaken the Gospel. I mean already God said there will be those who will persecute the Gospel, will betray the Son of Man, will turn their backs on God, will rebel, will wander away, will sin, etc. So its pretty common that attacks frequently occur on God's people. But hardly any succeed in shaking our faith anchored in Christ the solid Rock =)

I have heard a lot of the time that there are Christians world wide who are "shoving" the Gospel down the throats of the unsaved non believers. Well, as harsh as it sounds, i cant deny that it does happen (and on their behalf if you feel offended or disgusted well.........no harm intended in the first place). Actually some might have just gone a little too far or misinterpreted the bible's meaning when God said "Go into the world and preach the good news". Preaching was just meant to be that. Preaching. Aka sharing. Not shoving. Tat would be less a message of conviction and more of intrusion and against the will. God said that we have a freewill to choose ; whether to believe in Him or not. The rest is entirely up to you.

I was a non believer for a substantial period of time. And that time i pretty much thought that religion was a very subjective thing. Can choose whatever u like to believe in. Well to put things this way, its like i can believe another lady or man to be my parents and not my current real ones, coz i strongly believe it. And we think that we are right in our beliefs. As long they treat me nice or all is smooth sailing why not. Truth is i already have my true parents so i shall not believe in any other ppl to be my parents.

If you ask me, did i feel religious with my previous belief? Not really. I didnt feel a love as such as God's love. Was I once apprehensive about God? Yes i was. But did people tried to shove to Gospel down my throat? Yes there were. But there must be a reason why these people are so adamant to tell me this bit of information. Why is Jesus Christ so important? I knew He died on a cross. He died for sins (sins of only Christians i thought). I did know He resurrected 3 days after He died (from reading the children's illustrated Bible). But thats abt it. What is the significance or the price of this wasnt really much a bother to me, not till when one fine day I started to get all the pieces together on my own. No one shoved the Good News down my throat. And no one preached a hard lecturing message to me begging on all fours to accept Christ as my Lord and Saviour. I decided that all on my own after and this is what I can conclude :

1) I knew Jesus died for sins of believers and non believers because He doesnt want us to be in hell and our souls destroyed forever with Satan. (Imagine dying and not existing afterwards)
2) I found purpose tat is higher than any other purpose.
3) God loves still to those saved and unsaved (though the unsaved may be unaware or ungrateful)
4) I experienced God's miracles which never happened before.
5) Even if my world falls apart, God doesnt fall apart.
6) I 100% know where im going to and im not afraid at all, not the slightest bit.

I guess the first Words of God ever etched in my mind was when i was 12 when my granduncle passed away. A fellow believer (which i shall see in heaven and have a lovely chat with him =) ) was John 11:25 - "I am the Ressurection and the Life, he who believes in me will live even though he dies. He who believes in me, shall not perish, but have everlasting life." These were profound to me at the time, but i had been pondering abt this meaning for a very long time. How can someone claim such a statement?

So was i brainwashed? No. If i was brainwashed, i wouldnt have the sanity to think straight. Signs i am not brainwashed : I still love my family very much. I still want a successful life. I still want to get married and have kids. I got lots of stuff i want to do in life. I love bikes, i like girls, i want more money, i want a beautiful wife, id like to just own any cool thing i can have.

With great respect to other religions, God isnt interested in a religion, He is just interested in us. He doesnt really care how many times we pray or bow or worship Him. He just wants a relationship with us as intimate as possible. He just seeks a heart to heart relation. He has first offered us His hand. He has knocked our doors. Up to us to accept and open the door. Well you can let Him in and stay without totally wanting to be friends with Him. Its totally fine, coz He knows first hand.

There is one fact to clear : Christians dont claim that the unbelievers will perish in hell. No, we didnt say/claim that or cook up that story. God said in the bible Himself . | Revelation 21:8  - "But for the cowardly and unbelieving and abominable and murderers and immoral persons and sorcerers and idolaters and all liars, their part will be in the lake that burns with fire and brimstone, which is the second death."  God warned. Up to us to listen.

And this has always been a heated argument and debate : "If God was so all loving, why let us die and go to hell?" Answer : Some didnt go through the bible enough yet. God is all loving yes. But God is also a just Judge. God already told us a million times that if we dont behave (for our own good and our sakes), He will need to carry out punishment. It will have to be an unescapable punishment. Otherwise leniency would equal unfairness. God cannot go back on His Word He has established. Therefore there is only one : Death in hell with Satan (Just as Satan, formerly Gods mighty angel misbehaved, he too will be in hell forever when the final day comes). Not even angels escape slight punishment, what more us? But God, amid all that He has said............ He still (gracefully) gives us the choice to choose. But we will have to pay for our choice. Why give up heaven for hell? Final answer : God loves us, some of us just dont love and hate Him.Its not God wanting to punish the sinner. But He has to punish the sin inside the sinner as God does not tolerate sin the slightest. And that leaves Him no choice. God doesnt like punishing people, but many asked for it. That is when Jesus becomes the rescue plan to take place for the sins of sinners. He didnt die a misfortunate death. He lived to die for the eternity of those who wants to find a way to be saved from hell. And this is also another choice. He did the hard work. The rest is up to us.

Jesus lived and died. And lived again. If His resurrection was fake, then fine we lose and die a cold death into non existence. But IF He did live, I'd be on the safe side no matter what. A 50/50 chance is better than a 0/100 isnt it? But i dont believe out of chance. I believe out of experience. I share what is real and what is true.

So far, i have not heard stronger better more fantastic testimonies of changed lives, miracles, signs, wonders, revival, breakthrough, etc from anywhere else except those from those who love God and those who trust God. If there are I'd like to hear it soon =) If you ask why doesnt God bring miracles to the whole world and save us the trouble? Answer : How much will u appreciate the miracle of those who really need it, and those who just want to get it but dont really need it? If a bank wrote off a debtor owing RM2million and another who owes RM200, wouldnt the RM2million debtor really appreciate the pardon? But what about the RM200 debtor? If he had also RM2million cash in hand he wont regard the pardon much. Therefore God isnt just simply going to give miracles. Its not whether we deserve it or not. Its whether God see's that we would really appreciate what He has and will give. He doent want to spoil us or else we would soon treat Him as a vending machine. Truth be told : This is human nature.

So my sharing is nothing more than just telling the truth about why it is as such that we dont also want to see anyone we love not being in heaven when we finally get there. If i dont see you in heaven, its forever i wont see you or hear from you at all. Not even emails or MSN works anymore up there.

If i want to blame satan for causing alot of the misconception and confusion i have every right to do so. But if i want to blame God for not taking action about anything that seems to need a fix, i cant do that, coz God knows what He is doing. Satan doesnt coz he doesnt think before he leaps. But if i it is by our hardened heart and unwillingness to not listen, then that is beyond my control and will.

Ultimately, we will make decisions which may change our life for the next decade or more. But if that decision ultimately in the end brings good, and along the way some stony path slows down the pace, it is still worth the walk and the journey.

I am still as imperfect as every human on this planet. No one human can claim perfectness. Truth be told. But i am an imperfect human who found the perfect way to live life.

Cheers

Not the way i want to end my day 7/4/2010

Yes you will see this in Facebook as well. No mistake. I decided to shoot here instead of there coz the status box has limited character space.

I must re-iterate myself that i am a person (which u cant possibly change) who hates last minute changes to already set appointments/schedules/plannings/work/play etc. It really throws me off balance and i can easily get frustrated. (We all have our own pet peeves dont we?). When i plan something to do and its set with ready plan to be carried out in advance i shall see it till the day that is supposed to be carried out that NOTHING tries to shift it. I keep to my word as best as i can especially when it involves important things or other people.

I had almost half a day of nearly free time in the office doing nothing but fiddling around wit the new alarm system today which is just computer clicks and button pressing. Work ends at 6pm sharp. Now why did boss have to give me extra work to do when its chow time when he could have given me earlier?? Last minute. And if he wanted to give me....he could have at least told me in advance to prepare.

Now why am i upset? Maybe you guessed : I have an appointment after work. Yes. I was suppose to coach a new student at 7.30pm. And knowing KL this is a bad time to be doing things. Which is why i was ready to run out the door at 6pm sharp. OK FINE. So boss got me to do work. K nevermind. I will do it as fast as i can. What can be so tough just to print some AutoCAD drawings?

Fark this printing system that it chooses today of all days and of all times to have errors in printing and now i have to find out how to print 20 drawings in A3 size before i leave. Remember. KL. 6pm. 7.30pm. Not much time. And though its just from PJ to Subang...........this is PJ TO SUBANG here. Not Sitiawan to Seri Manjung. Its different. Cancle the appointment? No way.

And with this printing problem i have no choice to print out in A4 with one printer and then enlarge to A3 on the photocopy. 20 drawings. Each have to set page by page print settings..........why? Coz today the whole thing just seemed messed up when other times i have no problems. Yea..........shit happens at work. No surprise.

Its now 7pm and im still not done. I called to RE-Arrange to 8pm. Thank God my student was understanding enough. So now im rushing like mad to get the job done. And in the process i : Made countless printing blunders, not go to toilet when i have to coz i want to finish this first, had to think how to pass SJ jams. I didnt care i just printed out everything. Photocopy, chucked to my boss. And get the hell out by 7.30pm. Ok maybe i can be on time. WRONG

Housing area also got traffic jam. Ever hear that before? Yes im sure you have. Jam as in i moved 100 meters in 5 minutes. 8pm im still thinking. now its 7.45. Shit shit shit. And then my student calls. He cant make it as his car has mechanical failure. Im not breathing sigh of relief here. Im even more annoyed that he cant make it. IF it was done on schedule it probably will be fine. Now im in a jam, he is stuck in the middle of the road. So what do i get in the end? Cincai printing work for my boss, stuck in a jam in a housing area, my student in trouble himself, me not eating at all since lunch, my patience running low, my wasted planning, his wasted time. Shall i continue? So who's to blame? I dont blame God. Boss? I duno. Jam? I duno. Printer? I duno. Computer? I duno. Time? I duno. Myself? I duno.

Yeah now you all will be telling me chill chill take a chill pill, ask God for patience kindness gentleness self control, you will be telling me shit happens, you will be telling thats normal part of life, dont be so hard on yourself, and every other single consolidating assuring calming word from my fellow friends pastors and family members would be soon on the way here.

Im dedicated when i want to do the thing i love/like the most. And i dont think its an excuse to postpone appointments actually due to small reasons like office work overtime etc.

Fine then so after me making all this hoopla public to read and laugh or shake heads, you all might be asking me to do one thing : Suck it in, grow up and shut up. Maybe thats what i will do. If you hate this job tat makes u so pissed all the time then why not just quit. Maybe thats what i will do.

Bye

Point blank

No seriously.................

@#(^@#$)($(|#@(_!@|//*#/^&^/*#!/*!

Lot of rubbish is in my head...............

How have i changed recently?